If you’re the parent of a teenage girl, then it’s likely you never say the right thing. Ever. Say This, Not That (To Your Teenage Daughter) is your convenient, pocket-sized guide to asking and answering questions, starting conversations, and filling in the silence with your teen.

Say This, Not That (To Your Teenage Daughter) is based on the work of Cognition Builders, a 164-person firm that teaches families all over the globe how to have constructive conversations. The authors have selected the most common and confounding conversational quandaries families face, and solved them for you. Chapters in this little treasure cover a variety of situations familiar to any parent of teenage girls, such as: When She’s In a Mood; When Her Heart Is Broken; When the Phone Becomes an Appendage; and When She’s “Totally Stressed Out.”

Ilana Kukoff began her career in education as the Chief Nurturing Officer of her family, a senior management position whose principal responsibilities included, but were by no means limited to, feeding, diapering, clothing, teaching, worrying, inspiring, and just the right amount of smothering. Somewhere between teaching her children the ABCs and explaining to them that it is NOT okay to "borrow" Mom's car keys to visit Jason's house, Ilana launched Cognition Builders, an education company that fosters healthy family dynamics via proprietary (Latin for "our lawyers will sue you if you even think about copying this") in-person and online techniques. Ilana was one of the keynote speakers at a TEDx conference, has been featured as an expert in parent-child relations on numerous episodes of Access Hollywood, and has been quoted in many family- and education-focused periodicals. When she's not helping other mothers and fathers communicate lovingly -- and effectively -- with their children, Ilana enjoys spending time with own kids (Zak, a budding entrepreneur and senior at NYU, and Alexandra, a proud first-year Bruin at UCLA). 

Jessica Yuppa Huddy is an M.S. of Applied Psychology, Cognition Builders’ Director of Curriculum, Assistant Clinical Director, and Chief Family Architect. Jessica is the lead strategist in the development and customization of new curricula and education-based programs for Cognition Builders. In her work as Chief Family Architect, Jessica provides clients with language and behavior substitution; fixing the family dynamics as they unfold in real-time. Jessica plays a collaborative role in coordinating the efforts of her clients’ psychiatrists and psychologists; to inform and integrate their efforts. Based in New York City, Jessica has lead cases everywhere from Hawaii, to the UK, to Australia. Ironically, she also has ADHD. In her free time, you’ll find Jessica writing and reading poetry, singing, strumming a guitar and hiking in the Catskills with her husband (if the temperature outside is 75 degrees or warmer).*